‘Naamko Bree’, the Lepcha Marriage

‘Naamko Bree’ in Lepcha means marriage, the act of marrying someone or the ceremony at which this is done.  Here ‘Naamko’ means union and and ‘Bree’ means to twist two strands of threads into one; therefore, ‘Naamko Bree’ in Lepcha really means ‘uniting a man and woman  in matrimony’.  To the Lepchas, marriage is not only a union of a man and woman but it is also an enduring relationship, union between two families, clans and villages.  Divorce is very rare in the Lepcha community.

The term folklore, traditional stories of a community or nation, has come to mean myths, legends, folktales, proverbs, ballads, songs, rhymes, riddles etc whose medium is the spoken words.  Folklore is verbal art and knowledge.  Here ‘folk’ means people and ‘lore’ means knowledge.  The original indigenous Lepcha community have a very rich tradition of folklore.  There is a very popular myth about the ‘Origin of Lepcha Marriage’.  It is called ‘Naamko Bree Aait Sung’.  ‘Aait’ means origin and ‘Sung’ means a tale, narration of events of a person or persons or such events as a subject for narration.  ‘Aait Sung’ also means mythology.  The go-between called ‘Peeboo or Bekboo’ in Lepcha from both bride and bridegroom sides conduct the entire wedding and they must be well versed in the origin of the Lepcha marriage.  In-depth and intense discussion and debate between the two ‘Peeboos or Bekboos’ on the merits of the  traditional Lepcha marriage customary laws, system, procedures and origin of Lepcha marriage is always very interesting and worthwhile to listen to  during the Lepcha marriage ceremony.

The myth on Origin of Lepcha Marriage is a justification on the Lepcha social custom, especially the Lepcha marriage.



Origin of the Lepcha Marriage

Thousands of years ago, a young, robust and powerful Lepcha named Târbongthing after journeying and exploring Mâyel Lyâng for many months arrived at a placed called ‘Pâri Pâgyen’. Very  tired, fatigued, and hungry, Tarbongthing looked for a shelter for the night but no village or human settlement was in sight. He saw a fruit tree nearby with hundreds of birds on it. His one thought was to satisfy his hunger and, therefore, he set Radoo Ramyâng, a bamboo  trap, to catch birds on the fruit tree. He caught a few birds and satisfied his hunger.

The next day, Târbongthing set Radoo Ramyâng once again on the same fruit tree and went away to look for a village. When he returned to his shelter in the afternoon, Târbongthing found, to his annoyance, there were only dry twigs and leaves hanging on his trap instead of birds. Târbongthing was puzzled, angry as well as curious to find out the person who was perpetrating a mischievous deed on him. The next day once again, he very carefully set Radoo Ramyâng on the same fruit tree and hid himself under the bushes and watched.
In the late afternoon, Târbongthing saw a young beautiful girl coming out from the wood towards the trap and freeing the birds one after another from the trap and putting dry  twigs and leaves on it instead.
On seeing this, Târbongthing sneaked behind her and caught her very firmly. The young and beautiful girl, although surprised, fought back to free herself from Târbongthing but Târbongthing, somehow, over powered and subdued her at the end.
Târbongthing asked her, ‘Why did you free the birds from the trap?’ The young girl replied that she was the guardian, preserver and champion of the birds and asked him, ‘What harm did these innocent birds do to you?’ She further said that she freed the birds from the trap because they have an equal right to live in this beautiful Mayel Lyang.
Both of them were young, beautiful and handsome. They were attracted to each other; in fact, it was love at first sight.
When she wanted to go home because it was getting very late, Târbongthing barring her way asked her name and her place of residence. The girl answered that her name was, ‘Nârip Naom’ and she came from ‘Sakyong’. Târbongthing again asked her if she would run away with him to start a new family life of their own. Hearing his appeal, Nârip Naom replied, ‘If you really want my hand in marriage, you must ask my mother’s and uncles’ permissions. My mother’s name is Taee-Tanye Moo- Nyoo. Having said thus, she hurriedly left and disappeared into the woods.
Târbongthing returned to his mother, Numkoot Âmoo Nyoo and narrated his stories including his meeting with a young and beautiful girl, Narip Naom. He expressed his desire to marry Narip Naom to his mother because he was in love with Nârip Naom. Numkoot Âmoo Nyoo, Târbongthing’s mother, summoned her brothers and sent them to ‘Sâkyong’ to ask for Nârip Naom’s hands in marriage to Târbongthing.
Nârip Naom’s mother and uncles were also very happy indeed and welcomed the proposal of a marriage between Nârip Naom and Târbongthing, however, Nârip Naom’s mother and uncles said that Târbongthing and his uncles must adhere  to and fulfill the marriage conditions.
A meeting of the Lepchas was convened at ‘Rongjyeng Purtâm’ to finalise the Lepcha Marriage Customary Law and the neccesary items to be provided and presented as a bride’s price during the wedding to the bride’s party. Târbongthing and his uncles agreed to all the conditions of the Lepcha Marriage Customary Law and the bride price. At the end of the meeting, a bamboo was planted to commomerate the occasion. The sacred bamboo grove of the Lepchas called ‘Chimoo Aeyong moo pobong’ still stands at Sakyong, Faokraam Takraam (Dzongu), North Sikkim.

Târbongthing and his uncles were able to collect the bride price and placed them in front of the bride’s mother, uncles, aunts and relatives during the wedding. And thus the first Lepcha  marriage ceremony was solmanized between Nârip Naom and Târbongthing  at Tarbong Narip Purtaam, Sakyong, Faokraam Takraam (Dzongu), North Sikkim and the first Lepcha Marriage Customary Law thus originated in Mayel Lyang. The die hard Lepchas continue to practise their ancient Lepcha Marriage  Customary Law even today. The Lepcha women continue to receive the respect, dignity and honour  they so deserve from their Lepcha men even today.


The Lepcha Marriage Customary Laws*

The first Lepcha Marriage Customary Laws made and drawn thousand of years ago at Rong Jyeng Purtaam, Sakyong, Faokraam-Takraam, now known as Dzongu, North Sikkim are still prevelent among the lovers and custodians of the Lepcha tradition and culture in Mayel Lyang.  They are:

1.  No Lepcha marriage shall take place within the same ‘Aagit’, clan, in accordance with the ancient Lepcha Customary Law.  No Lepcha shall marry within his or her closely related family members either.  If, in case, it happens, it shall be termed as ‘Naamtaok’ or ‘Thaam Nyaot’ in Lepcha meaning ill-omened, ill-starred, taboo and evil.  If such marriage, unfortunately, shall take place, then the man and woman involved in such illegal, forbidden, illicit, prohibited liaison shall be banished, exiled, never to return from the village and community because the Lepchas believe that same DNA and bone structures shall be found in the members of the same clan resulting in genetic defects.  A Lepcha with genetic defects shall never be fully developed and healthy, physically and mentally.  Their illicit springs shall not be accepted and entitled to the ancestral land and property.

2.  The following very important points, aspects, features and particulars shall also    be looked into, enquired, examined before the matrimony:
a.  Family or clan affected with ‘Daom’, leprosy and other dangerous hereditary diseases and illness.
 
b.  ‘Sthong Daot’- Member of the family or clan attacked, injured, or killed by a tiger.

c. A family or clan which has a history, tendency and inclination towards suicide  and murder.

d. A family or clan involved in fighting and killing over land and water disputes.            
No marriage shall take place with such family or clan if the above factors, cases from (a) to (d) are found to be true.

3.  Only after 4(four) generation on the mother side and clan, after the death of the great-grand-mother, a Lepcha man shall be allowed to marry from his mother’s clan, ‘Aagit’, again.

4.  Bride Price:-  Marriage price paid to the bride’s parents and relatives today at their residence shall be as follows:

a.  Nyaom Aasek Gyu -  Engagement Price

 i. Chyee, fermented beverage - one bundle/basket
ii. Garland (Phogo Rip Lyaak) - one
iii. Jyer Kaat -3 (three) Rupee silver coins

b.Myaok Panaol -  Bridegroom’s customary, official presents to the bride’s parents and relatives at the marriage ceremony :
i.   Aamoo ‘Dum-dyem’, bride’s mother’s dress - one set
ii.  Aamoo Kaomjung (sungdrong)    - Rs.101.00(One hundred & one) only
appreciation and honour to the bride’s mother   - Bronze plate-one
- Bronze vessel-one
iii.  Bikgoo Nin-chyer (Pomo- Pakyong)
(the bride’s mother’s milk) - Rs.35.00(thirty five) only.


iv.  Father’s Guardian Spirit of longivity and Life - 1(one) Lepcha hat,
3 (three) Rupee silver coins only,
1(one) garland (Phogo Rip Lyaak).
.
 v.  Bride’s paternal uncle and aunt (2) - 1(one) garland(Phogo Rip Lyaak) and
          Rs. 3(three) silver coins each only.
 vi. Bride’s maternal uncle and aunt(2) - 1(one) garland(Phogo Rip Lyaak) and
          Rs. 3(three) silver coins each only.
 vii Bride’s faaming (brother) (one) - 1(one) garland (Phogo Rip Lyaak) and Rs.3(three) silver coins only.   viii. Peeboo/Bekboo, Go-between
         from Bride side - 1(one) garland(Phogo Rip Lyaak) and
  Rs 3(three) silver coins only,
             1(one) basket of ‘Chi’ with 1(one) garland
  (Phogo Rip Lyaak) and Rs.3(three) silver  coins on top of it only.
ix.  Laom-sut.  It is also called - 1(one) front left leg of a bull
      ‘Myaok Mungkoong’  1(one) hind right leg of a bull.
c. Nyaom Lee Hraon - Bride’s entrance to her new house. The following items shall be arranged, provided, and taken to the Bridegroom’s  parents:

i.  1(one) basket of Chi, fermented beverage
ii.  Two bottles of liquor
iii.  Front left leg of a bull

d.  Nyaom Mungkong Zo-gool -  a complete dressed cock.  The above item, Nyaom Mungkong Zo-gool, shall be given to the Bride’s party on completion of the marriage ceremony at the Bridegroom’s house. It is to be taken the to the Bride’s parents as a token of respect and clearly denoting that their daughter has been very gladly acceepted by the Bridegroom’s   parents, clan, village.

e.  Bride’s dress and jewelry-   Although it is not mandatory and compulsory, the following dress and jewelry may be provided by the Bridegroom’s parents for the bride:
i.  Dum-dyem (dress) - 1 set
ii.  Jyoordaong Tago (black gawn) - one
iii.  Takvil Lyaak(neckless) made of cane splits - one
iv.  Kakel(bangle) made of cane splits - one pair
v.  Aanyaor Kong (ear rings) made of cane splits - one pair
vi.  Ka-Chhyaop or Chhyaap Chhyaap
   made of silver with Saret-Aajet design - one
vii.  Panthop (badge) made of silver - one
viii.  Sambraang Baor made of silver - one


5.  Aangaop:-  Marriage is sacred and holy according to the Lepcha Customary Law.   To keep up the good, happy and strong bond, relationship and unity between the two families, clans and villages, the Lepcha ‘Aangaop’ system came into existence.  ‘Aangaop’ shall take place under the following circumstances only:
a.  On the untimely death of a husband, a young widow, if she wishes, after one year, she shall be betrothed and married to one of the following relations, if he is willing and happy,  in consultation with the family members, elders and Village Lepcha Associations from both sides:
i.  Deceased husband’s single younger brother.
ii.  Deceased husband’s single nephew.              

b.  On the untimely demise of a wife, a young widower, if he wishes, after a year, he shall be betrothed and married to one of the following relations, if she is willing and happy,  in consultation with the family members, elders and Village Lepcha Associations from both sides:
i.  Deceased wife’s single younger sister.
ii.  Deceased wife’s single niece.                              

6.  Under this unique marriage system of ‘Aangaop’,  the child/children, if any from the previous marriage shall continue to receive the same love, affection, and care from the new step-father or mother.  A child/ children shall remain happy and above all in safe hands.

7.  In case of no issue, single younger sister of the wife, if she is willing and happy, shall also be given in ‘Aangaop’.

8.  This way, the same harmony, balance, understanding, relationship, and unity shall prevail in the house and between the two families, clans and villages.

On completion of the wedding rituals, the newly wedded couple are blessed by the elders in songs.  A singer composes the song then and there and sings; it is called ‘Apryaa Vam’ in Lepcha.  An example of a marriage ‘Apryaa Vam’ is given below:





Bree Munlaom  Apryâ Vom
Hâ aey . . . . . !
Marum mathaok rey nyaom myok hani sa,
Choo bi Kong Chhen ngân zaong,
Bâm kaon, boor kaon, paot kaon, târ kaon,
Sukdum kâ aom ngân kaon.
Rângnyoo Rângeet zaong lenchhyo hani sâ,
Chung song tet hoon kaon,
Nyaom Myok hanyi sâ,
Lenchhyo tukpo rey, chung song hoon kaon.
Hâ aey . . . . . !
Âmoo abosâ kurvong kalit kâ,
  Noor arey tho phu mo
Bokoo moo baong sâ, ren rit song dun kâ
Nyaom arey laom phu mo
Noor arey huna, lee rey lee kung na
Aom kaon mee chur hoon na
Nyaom arey huna, sarong sutnyi na
Aom kaon mee chur hoon na.
Hâ aey . . . . . !
Ho nâmko munlaom len nung sâ,
Bree sâ tim rey kâ,
Phaleng, numleng zoom ba na,
Laok kâ lem kâ voong loong na.
Bree sâ timrey kâ, laok kâ, lem kâ,
Voong loong na
Bree sâ timrey kâ,
Laok kâ ley, lem kâ ley,
Bree sâ timrey kâ.










Blessings to a Bride

Hâ aey . . . . !

Let the bride and groom live long
Like the Himalayas standing strong.
Let them flower and fruit
With bright sunshine on them,
In this world.

Like the love of Teesta and Rangeet
Let them flow together forever, and
Let their love endure for all time.

Hâ aey . . . . . . !

Into the laps of groom’s parents,
The jewel bride is entrusted,
Amid uncles, aunts and relatives as witnesses.
Let the jewel bride shine,
Let her bring the light to this house
From this day onwards.

Hâ aey . . . . . . !

On completion of the marriage vows and blessings,
On the union of  these two,
Let the young boys and girls
Dance, sing and play together,
To celebrate the wedding with joy and delight !